it is so frustrating that i cant find my creative juice flowing… its like my body have just stop producing it.. or maybe i didn’t have it actually and i only have this sheer imagination that i possess it. theres a lot of other factors aside from my theory that i don’t have it.. albeit its only relative to my mood.

i hate having deadlines and beating a date when doing something artistic just kills the flow of good creative juice.. cmon i mean how can you force to have that artistic sense when you are pressured..

Architecturally maybe having that time factor affects the design outcome.. mostly for me in a good way.. less procrastination less redundant design scheme.. and getting a much more solid unique design scheme. NO… NO.. synthesizing..

Painting is another.. and thats the problem.. i cant get a better subject and a painting scheme. just by looking at my frame… i already know that if i started to apply colors into it.. ill be just wasting that frame coz i wont like it.. and i know thats not what i want to achieve..

its so photographic now… seeing some deep thought or maybe cerebral photos. cerebral in the sense that it uses the brain to produce this uber cool portraits. im so into it and loving each and every detail that has been captured in those portraits. or maybe its just that im so disturbed and overfed by those

one shitty potraits.. two fuckn’ snapshot.. three fake eyes… four et al…